Freed by Him Read online

  "You don't even work here?"

  She smiled and shook her head. "Nope, I just tend to stop by most weekends."

  I looked at her, dumbfounded. I couldn’t believe that a young, beautiful woman would regularly give up her weekends, to spend time at a refuge, and then willingly put herself in danger by going up against a man twice her size.

  "Guess they were lucky you were here then, Ninja Barbie."

  She laughed, grimacing at the same time. "I'm no Barbie!" She paused, frowning, and looked at me thoughtfully before a wicked grin broke out on her face.

  "I prefer Warrior Princess!" She smiled broadly before spinning on her heels, causing her hair to swish around, and walking out the door.

  I was still looking at the doorway with a dumbass smile on my face when Marcus walked through it a few moments later.

  He gave a low whistle, and shaking his head, he said softly to me as he got close, "You lucky bastard no wonder you wanted to stay."

  Lena

  "Arghhhhhh," I yelled out loud as I got in my car, hitting my hands against the steering wheel. I'd calmed down and finally stopped shaking, but the sick feeling was back with a vengeance.

  I’d plastered a smile on my face and forced myself to ignore the churning of my stomach whilst I tried to calm and support those that had been frightened half to death, but it had still been there.

  It had only disappeared whilst I spoke with the police officer. I’d been captivated by his striking green eyes, forcing myself to listen to his questions before getting the hell out of there. My stomach was flipping over speaking to him but it was for a completely different reason, and that just wasn’t right.

  It must be all the adrenaline making me crazy.

  I’d had training and I’d sparred with people before, but it had always been a controlled environment, I’d never needed to defend myself like that before.

  I took a deep breath and started the car before dialling my best friend using the hands-free.

  She answered on the second ring. "You're late girl! Damn, do you think I just sit around on my sweet arse on a Saturday night waiting for your lame arse to decide to call me!?" She sounded annoyed, but I knew she wasn't really.

  "Hey Mads, there was an incident at the refuge. I'm on my way home now..."

  I didn't even get to finish before she interrupted, her voice full of concern, the change in her tone immediate, "You OK? What happened? I'll meet you at yours."

  I didn't even bother answering her questions. I just responded with "See you at mine in 30" and cut the call.

  Her car was parked on my driveway as I pulled in beside her. I could see her sitting in the driver’s seat, tapping away on her phone.

  She'd been my best friend since we’d met in school at 12, she’d had my back for half my life, and I knew I could always rely on her.

  As I got out of my car and started walking to the front door, I could see her exiting her car and carrying her overnight bag.

  I smiled; this girl was an absolute star.

  I kicked my shoes off as I walked through the door and went straight into the kitchen. I grabbed two glasses from the cupboard and went to the fridge to get a bottle of wine. I heard Maddie coming in after me and sitting down at the breakfast bar, "So, what happened? Everyone OK?" she asked anxiously. She knew how much the women at the refuge meant to me.

  I had my back to her. "Yeah, everyone's ok."

  I answered over my shoulder as I poured the wine, continuing to speak to her. "Some arsehole managed to get in and caused..."

  I was speaking as I put the wine back in the fridge, as I turned to face her, she suddenly gasped, cutting me off mid-sentence, "Fucking hell, Lee!" She jumped up off the stool and snatched the wine glasses from me, dumping them on the counter.

  She spun back around and grabbed me by the tops of my arms, her face flushed. She looked furious.

  "What the fuck happened?!" she demanded.

  I shrugged my arms free of her. "It's not that bad..."

  She pursed her lips, irritated, looking like a mother about to scold her wayward child.

  I leaned over and picked her glass up. Handing it back to her, I pleaded with her, “Drink,” and she took a large gulp.

  Smiling at her reassuringly I carried on, "Some guy, a former partner I think, got in and caused some hell. I took him and smacked my face on the way down. It was over and done within minutes; it’s not a big deal." I shrugged at her and she shook her head.

  "Seriously Lena, this is screwed up." She looked pained, and I reached out and hugged her.

  "Honestly, Mads, I'm not hurt."

  I heard her sigh; she was still upset.

  "I know something I could tell you about that would make you smile," I said in a sing-song voice, and she pulled back from me. Handing me my own glass, she sat back and looked at me sullenly, challenging me.

  "He was about 6 foot..." I started, and she frowned at me looking troubled.

  "This better not be the crazy bloody lunatic..."

  I started laughing at her. "No! The cop that came was gorgeous..." I grinned at her. "Lick your lips, squeeze your thighs together, and remind yourself not to sigh out loud, gorgeous."

  I winked at her and she grinned back at me, leaning forward in her chair now fully engaged.

  "I’m still annoyed - but perfect way to distract me … describe!" She closed her eyes and I carried on, "About 6 foot maybe just over, really striking green eyes with flecks of brown, dark hair, tanned, toned and built..." I paused, tying to find the words, "Think more GI Joe than a buffed gym rat."

  "Mmm," she sighed, "he sounds lovely." She snapped open her eyes, "though he must have been for you to even notice! And not just notice … my God! You looked that closely into his eyes!"

  She looked at me in stunned surprise, and I immediately felt defensive.

  She noticed and grinned, "C'mon Lena, you have an unhealthy interest in remaining single."

  I took a drink myself before answering her, trying to buy myself an extra few seconds.

  "I'm extremely busy, and let's be honest here Mads, most guys are complete wasters. I haven't got time to weed through the liars and arseholes to find the diamond in the rough." I smiled sweetly at her. "Besides, I already have my diamond right here." I put my hands on her knees and fluttered my eyelashes at her in jest.

  She put her finger in her mouth pretending to be sick as she shook her head at me.

  We spent the rest of the evening catching up and chatting. Maddie worked as a nurse at the local hospital, so between her crazy shifts, and my long hours and trips away, I didn't get to catch up with her anymore as much as I’d have liked.

  We'd arranged over a month ago to go out this Saturday, but she'd not been bothered at all about changing the plans to stay in, it had helped that we were able to reschedule.

  I'd known her half my life and honestly couldn't imagine my life without her.

  My parents often joked that they had three daughters. The longest that we'd ever gone without speaking in the whole time I'd known her was four days.

  She was the first person I spoke to when I was upset or happy, and she knew me better than anyone; she knew almost everything about me. Well, almost everything.

  My heart was pounding so loud it was the only sound I could hear, the beat vibrating through my whole body, the sound like a drum being hit over and over.

  His eyes were fixed on me, piercing me with his stare. I could smell the sickly sweet smell, and my chest hurt, my breaths coming in such quick succession that my lungs were screaming out for more air.

  I tried to move away from him, but my feet were rooted to the floor as he advanced on me, his angry snarling face coming within inches of mine, his spittle landing on my cheeks as he screamed obscenities at me.

  My arms hung limp and loose at my sides despite my head screaming at me to react. I whimpered pathetically, as he raised his arm.

  I flinched as his fist came rushing toward my face, crying out as I felt ha
nds on me.

  Through the haze I could hear my name being called. I was dragged to consciousness by Maddie shaking me violently, although even after she let me go, I continued to tremble.

  My body was drenched in sweat, and I could feel my heartbeat in my mouth.

  I felt dizzy and nauseated, trying to calm my frantic heart and breathing.

  Maddie looked at me her face furrowed in concern. "You OK?"

  She rubbed my arm. "Hey, are you ok? Talk to me baby girl! That must have been one hell of a nightmare!"

  She looked worried and I tried harder to calm down my erratic breathing.

  I patted her hand, "I'm OK." I rubbed my hands roughly over my face. I wanted to get up and grab a drink, get away from her looking at me just for a few minutes to pull myself together. I couldn’t leave though; I knew she’d follow me and press me for details.

  She was perched on the edge of the bed, still looking concerned. "Do you want to talk about it? Was it about what happened earlier?"

  I smiled weakly at her. "I'm OK, honestly, Mads. It was just a nightmare; everyone gets them now and again, right? Go on-" I indicated in the direction of the spare room, "-go back to bed. I'm fine now." I tried to look convincing and she looked back at me uneasily.

  "You sure? Do you want me to scoot in next to you?"

  I smiled at her more genuinely this time, finally starting to calm down.

  "No, it's OK. Thank you though. Honestly, I'm OK now. Goodnight."

  She got up and turned to walk out of the room. As she got to the doorway, she stopped and turned back to me smiling, "You want to close your eyes and think about that hot policeman before you go to sleep. He’ll put a smile on your face, and hopefully you'll have sweet dreams the rest of the night." She blew me a kiss and walked out, going back to the spare room.

  I lay back in the darkness and focused on my breathing, slowly calming myself back down. I hadn’t suffered with nightmares for a long time.

  Today had obviously affected me more than I’d realised or admitted. I just hoped it wasn’t going to start them up again.

  I closed my eyes and tried to force myself to drift back off to sleep. A smiling face with striking green eyes pushed its way into my thoughts and I felt my lips lift at the memory of him. I curled up on my side and pulled the duvet around me, glad to have something to distract me from the dark thoughts I was trying to keep at bay.

  Lena

  I slammed hard into the mat again and yelled out in frustration as Paul stood over me, shaking his head.

  "Get your head in the game, girl!" He scowled at me, and holding out his hand to me, yanked me up to my feet. "What gives?!" he barked at me, looking annoyed.

  This session had been a waste of time. I'd spent most of the time so far sprawled out on the mat. I was going to be sore and aching tomorrow and we weren’t even half way through.

  I sighed, "I dunno, Paul." I rolled my shoulders and stared off into the distance.

  “Is it over that business in the refuge?" he asked.

  I looked at him and shook my head. It wasn't strictly the incident with the guy that was bothering me. I looked down at the floor before rubbing the back of my neck again with my right arm and looking him straight in the face before blurting out, "It brought a lot of shit back up for me that I thought was dead and buried. I'm exhausted because I'm not sleeping properly and I'm fucked off that I even feel this way. It was years ago, for God’s sake!" I cursed and looked away, feeling tears sting my eyes.

  What the hell was happening, I never cried. It must be the nightmares stirring things up again on top of the lack of sleep. I blinked rapidly, forcing my eyes to clear.

  Paul just stood there waiting for me to continue. I looked back at him. His lips pursed together and his face impassive, he jerked his head, indicating for me to follow him, and walked off to the benches at the far back of his gym.

  This was where we usually sat at the start of our sessions just for a quick catch up.

  I joined him, and we sat in silence for a moment or two before he spoke.

  "So you've still not told anyone about what happened?" It was more of a statement than a question really, but I shook my head and whispered, “No.”

  He sighed in frustration. "Girl, you can't keep running forever. Unless you deal with this, it's gonna eat you up. Don't give it that power over you." He turned to face me straight on but I spoke before he could continue.

  "How? What can I do?” I was annoyed but I heard the catch in my voice, which angered me even more.

  I’d worked hard to get to where I was. Fuck that guy and his fucked-up issues for bringing this shit back into my head. "It was years ago, in the grand scheme of what people go through it's not even that big a deal. What some women go through, damn … it’s not like he did actually..."

  My voice faded off, and I felt his strong arms grabbing me, forcing me to turn back to look at him.

  "Don't you dare, Lena! Don't belittle this to yourself. You need to decide yourself how you can fix this but you can’t keep pushing it down hoping it will go away. You think you’ve moved on but you haven’t, you’ve just ignored it, you need to deal with it in order to move on ... take some time out; come back next week, but I want your head screwed on right."

  He spoke with authority, his tone firm and commanding. He placed his hands on my shoulders and gave a gentle squeeze before walking back towards the office. I walked back to the mat, threw my stuff back into my bag and headed home.

  I'd met Paul nearly five years ago. He'd been taking the session in a women's empowerment course that our company had sponsored.

  Since I'd requested the sponsorship, my father had insisted that I went on the course, with hindsight I think he knew that Krav Maga was going to be demonstrated and thought that it would be good for me, if not that, then that it would pique my interest to try something similar.

  I'd been hooked straight away and had asked him for his details. The following week I'd gone to visit his gym and asked him to train me.

  He'd asked me straight out why I wanted to learn, and I'd stuttered and stammered about wanting to be fit and healthier and he'd simply nodded.

  We had started off with one-to-one training sessions twice a week; exactly one month later he'd asked me the same question, and I'd looked at him confused and taken aback.

  He'd explained that if I didn't trust him by then, I should get myself a new trainer. He’d stared back at me, unwavering, and I'd looked him square in the eye and answered him, "A while back, I was almost raped. I couldn't save myself." My voice was strained, but I carried on, "He hit me and he hurt me. No fucker is gonna do that again."

  I felt sick that I'd managed to say the words out loud but the force in my words surprised me. It was the first time that I’d admitted to anyone the reason that I’d left university.

  Paul nodded at me, his face giving nothing away as he looked at me. I couldn't imagine some of the stories he must have heard from women wanting to learn how to fight and defend themselves. His face was always difficult to read, but his eyes had warmth.

  He smiled at me. "Good girl, let's do this then."

  Over the years we'd formed a bond. He was a genuinely good guy; at nearly forty five he was just over twenty years older than me, but he could easily have passed for ten years younger than that. Standing over six foot tall he was an imposing figure. He was fit and toned; with tattoos running up both arms. I knew he’d been married with a son and a daughter who was a year younger than me.

  Due to my increased workload in recent years we tended to catch up once a week now. He was probably the only other person I had a close relationship with apart from Maddie.

  Lena

  My mood had deteriorated even further by the time I got home.

  I stomped into the house, going straight to the kitchen to get myself a drink. I poured myself a large wine as I dialled Maddie but got her voicemail. Cursing, I tried to decide what to do with myself.

  I had energy to burn; f
rustration and aggression that should have been used up in my training session had been left to simmer instead threatening to bubble over into rage.

  I was shattered after broken sleep the whole week due to recurring nightmares, as well as logistical nightmares in work resulting in long hours and stress headaches.

  Now, on top of that, I had Paul's words spinning around in my head, trying to force me to do and think things I didn't want to.

  My phone rang and I snatched it up, answering on the first ring.

  "Thank God for that!"

  I heard Maddie’s laughter down the line. "Now that's the kind of welcome I'm talkin’ about."

  I laughed back feeling calmer and less irritated just by hearing her voice.

  "Please say you can come out for an hour?!" I begged.

  "Are you OK? Is everything alright?" She immediately sounded concerned, and I mentally kicked myself.

  "Yeah, sorry, no drama. I just need to get out and unwind for a bit. It's been a bitch of a week."

  "Ahh..." she paused for a second, "yeah Ok, it's..." I heard muffled sounds down the phone as she moved about and then came back, "6.05 now ... I can meet you if you're real quick at, say, 6.30? I'm meeting Christian at 8.30..." She trailed off and I mentally kicked myself even harder.

  "Oh dammit I'm sorry, Mads. I totally forgot you had a date tonight. I knew you were off, I couldn’t think why I knew. Don't worry, it's fine, I'll catch you Saturday anyway," I said apologetically.

  Luckily we’d been able to reschedule our night out following the previous weekend’s cancellation.

  I felt guilty. She'd told me this about six times, and I knew she was excited because they'd been out a few times already.

  "Don't be daft! I'm ready now, anyway. I'm happy to meet you earlier!" I felt torn between how much I wanted to escape and whether it was inconveniencing her. Sensing my indecision, she carried on, "Lena, come out. If you can be ready I can pick you up in my taxi. But you'll have to get a taxi back on your own at about 8.30. It doesn't give us much time, so it's up to you?"

  I paused but only for a second. "I'll be ready."